A while back I got engrossed in searching Myspace for some of my friends from high school. It's been fun finding what they are up to these days. There have been a few surprises and it would appear that I am one of them. Recently I got a message from a guy I graduated with that has stuck with me.
Here is the line that struck me funny.
" I never thought that someone as smart as you would stay home. "
Now I am taking into account that he is a man and as a man he isn't aware of how women take things. We tend to look deeper into statements to find hidden meanings.(Or is it just me?) I don't think that he was trying to insult me, he is a nice guy. I should be flattered that he thinks I'm smart, but that isn't what I get hung up on. When I read this it sounds like he thinks my intelligence has been wasted by staying home to raise children.
9 comments:
If someone said that to me, I'd take it the exact same way you did - as if being a stay at home mom is nothing and requires no intelligence. Oh, yes, STAH moms just sit around eating bonbons all day long. Bastards.
I say :-P to him.
It's odd that you posted this today, though, because I've spent all day long looking for old friends and classmates on Myspace and Facebook. Now I'm gonna go search for you!
Bekah-I'm glad you found me!
I'm with you...I'd take it that way, but would understand that guys don't always think things through in the same way as the ladies!
Cxx
Personally I think it was his way of saying you're smart, but he has said so in a particularly tactless way. He sounds a bit of an idiot.
I certainly couldn't stay at home to look after my little one when she arrives, and I've nothing but admiration for anyone who can.
I think you are right...we women take things to much to heart (myself included...but I still think it sucks).
I think he was trying to compliment you in a off handed sort of way.
There is a whole generation of people out there, men and women, who think that women are wasting there time staying home with their kids...I actually feel sorry for the women who have to go to work and can't stay home with their children....
I think he was trying to complement you for being "smart", but he said it in a bad way....Men!
I would be really offended by that. I don't offend easily so you can see just where that statement stands.
I have wasted a ginormous amount of time on Myspace. It's sad really.
Men are tactless - me included - but I don't think he meant anything remotely hurtful by it.
What he meant I suspect is that he probably thought you'd be a successful businesswoman or rocket scientist rather than a hardworking stay at home Mom.
See, even I can't get it right!
This reminds me of a "friend" who a couple of years horrified me by telling me I looked good enough to rape. He couldn't believe I didn't see it as a compliment.
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